Lockdown .. Unleash ..
I want to do things mindfully ..
It’s a luxury that I am completely deprived off .. and its sad that people around me just don’t get it ..
Yeah .. sometimes I wonder .. if .. they get .. it ..themselves!
But .. are they aware of mindfulness .. in the first place?
The perks of mindfulness? The joy? I doubt it ..
Frankly .. until I was aware of the term a couple of years ago .. I didnt know the magic .. the peace .. myself ..
While I always though .. multi-tasking was the coolest .. be .. it .. with the computers 😉 or with the tasks/time myself ..
It was a crime to just get stuck with one job to do ..
Well … its only now .. after the children .. read children .. not child .. ( only A was just too easy), that I wholly embraced the bliss of focusing on one task .. at a time .. with you complete .. undivided .. attention ..
Like now, I used to love to document .. to write .. more than capturing pictures ..
Even the pictures needed to be paired with a story .. from the heart poured out .. when I was the mother of only 1 child ..
With the second one .. things definitely got harder ..
But .. with the third one .. in tow .. writing .. even .. a couple of .. lines .. let alone .. blogs .. is an unimaginable luxury ..
I found myself talking so much .. in conversations .. but .. unable to talk on one single blog ..
Now .. frankly I also .. learnt I am not a professional .. or even a good blogger ..
I love .. to write .. with all my heart ..
I still remember my dad and the hubster used to enjoy snippets of Aditya .., our daily musings .. and smile 🙂 sometimes .. grieve about the loss of my little brother ..
Frankly I used to find solace while I write .. and that was my coping up of my loss of my brother .. and this is exactly what I miss ..
I yearn .. more than what my words can say .. to pour .. to let go of the words .. my feelings .. my emptiness .. my insanity ..
I am in no position to think of this lockdown .. as anything as other than a perfect .. golden sunray of hope .. to write .. to heal .. and get ready to face the mundane .. lifestyle of running in toe with my crazy loving 3 littles .. and yearn helplessly of some more time of the hubster staying in town .. while he struggles .. to handle his fourth baby .. his startup ..
Till then let me simply soak in .. all the ambitious whims I have and nurture my enthusiasm with all the love I can give .. leaving the littles .. in the loving care of the doting nanna .. <3
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